i'm me don't be an asshole and run form the truth. the most painful thing that ever happened to me was not physically!
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i'm me don't be an asshole and run form the truth. the most painful thing that ever happened to me was not physically!
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♥ July 2008
♥ December 2008
♥ January 2009
♥ February 2009
♥ March 2009
♥ April 2009
♥ May 2009
♥ June 2009
♥ July 2009
♥ September 2009
♥ November 2010
♥ December 2008
♥ January 2009
♥ February 2009
♥ March 2009
♥ April 2009
♥ May 2009
♥ June 2009
♥ July 2009
♥ September 2009
♥ November 2010
title: 29.01.09 ready to start a fresh!
After many harsh, saddening days. i have come to a conclusion to move on and give up the old life. start a new but still in the same game. the key holder is ready, left with the bonus levels. well I'm ready and i hope so is eunice. its time to stop with the disappointment and put in the best. win together, lose together! Feels that the load have really come off today. people the happy - go - lucky SITI NURHASYIMA is back Well just hoping that my happy magic still works. no more disappointing the SIRS, the people around me and myself. (: well talked till now~ look at our pics. sorry its blurry but it almost the same just different people  |
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title: 28.01.09 I’m sorry for today. I’M SORRY SIRS. I know walking away from you when you wanted to talk to us was rude but I could not cry in front of you. Feeling horrible, pathetic and feelings I just can’t explain. I truly agree with chien cham sir’s post but I can’t seem to get over everything that fast. FDC is coming and we are simply not ready. I’m sorry for the disappointment. I’m very disappointed in myself. JOE SIR I’M VERY SORRY! I’m not that confident, happy, cheerful siti anymore. Have I lost my sense of happiness or is it just a relapse. I can’t seem to make people smile anymore. HOPELESS! Don’t want to disappoint the sirs. |
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title: 27.01.09 well today went to grandma's house. boredom!
then went to go eat lunch at bukit merah. food wasn't that good but nevermind! i still feel like i want to die. i'm not looking forward to tomorrow like i always do. poor eunice stuck at home feeling bored sorry eunice. okay to did not do anything much today so yeah. i'm losing it again. i'm going to die soon. feeling uneasy. AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! |
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title: 26.01.09 went out with kai ling today, we went to the botanical garden. wahhh, but eunice couldn't make it .
so today was supposed to be the day that helps us be ourselves again but infect it made it worse. after having fun at botanical garden went to meet eunice at amk mac. well we sortta spread our disease to eunice and now all three of us are so lost and not OURSELVES! OMG tomorrow got a theory lesson. so not looking forward to it. i feel so depressed. NEVER MIND LAH NEVER MIND! well accomplished two things able to take photos of myself without looking wierd and finally understood ho the PUBLIC TRANSPORT works. |
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title: 24.01.09 well another day past and i still haven't figure out myself.
Should i have doubts? Should i feel insecure? eunice: win together, lose together. thats sounds easy and nice but really its hard and not really that nice. there might be disappointment, expectations crushed and dreams shattered that can never be put back together. What exactly is the right thing to do? All our hard work put together for the past few training's, will it all go to waste. why is it that hard to make a decision? I have to keep smiling for all to feel better. I need time to clear it up but time is just running short. what do i do? I'm sorry for the disappointment . I really need to get up and go for it! 5 more trainings before it arrives. Feeling the pressure is normal, but are we ready? |
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title: 23.01.09 THINKING! THINKING! THINKING!
Went out with eunice, kai ling and met THE xxx. well wanted to talk to them in the first place but don't know how too. SUPER DUPER SORRY FOR WASTING YOUR TIME! i've been thinking and have come to an conclusion that what joe sir said the other time was right, the sky isn't always blue there will always be gray clouds but the wind will have to blow them away. i realize how CHILDISH i was and I'm still wondering what was i thinking. I'm glad we went to ask for their opinion and i really appreciate that they gave up some time for us even with their busy schedule. WE STILL CARE! i need to WAKE UP! STOP BEING SO CHILDISH! STOP FOOLING AROUND! PUT IN THE EFFORT! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! SORRY JOE SIR, ANTON SIR AND CLEMENT SIR. just waiting to see what tomorrow has instal for me! QUESTION OF THE DAY: Should i be sad, happy, confused, emotionless? ANSWERS PLEASE! |
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title: 22.01.09 UNHAPPINESS IN ME,
why is the world so complicated? why is it so hard to make decision and not hurting someone? I feel sad, unhappy, miserable, hopeless, sorry and last but not least disappointed. I'm so sorry JOE SIR for everything! Although i have hold in a lot of my feelings it is really hard for me to keep it in forever. However, Kai ling was there for me today. i feel like hitting my head on the wall till it bleeds and slowly i can close my eyes and never wake up again. I FEEL AS THOUGH THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END! From the bottom of my heart I'M SORRY JOE SIR! and thank you kai ling for being there for me when i needed you the most. |
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title: 21.01.09 RED CROSS AGAIN, WOOOO!
if you believe the words above then let me tell you! you are to NAIVE! yes i had red cross again, excited but I'm dying of homework damn it u feel like being crushed my expectations, disappointment, books, LIFE! AGHH! EUNICE, EUNICE, EUNICE! save me please! KAI LING, KAI LING, KAI LING! help me please! how i wish life wasn't this competitive and filled with expectations and disappointment. how i feel so sad and feel like screaming my head how i wish to cry by life a way but its all just wishes that most probably will never come true.TODAY! the feeling of disappointment and failure actually came to me i really feel HORRIBLE it was not the SIRS it was all us as a unit. SITI IS FEELING SHITTY. I'm sorry to the VI'S today for giving you guys such a hard time. ESPECIALLY HONG ZHOU/ JOE SIR! SORRY! eunice, kai ling, the SIRS and i went to CBM again to have a chit chat session. well it did make kai ling and eunice seem happier which did made me a little bit happier. the funniest thing that made me happier was the WWE between xxxxx and xxxxxx. well then walked with the SIRS and eunice to amk mrt. Apparently, chien cham sir is really into the festive season.(good for you)  WALKING~ ANTON SIR, JOE SIR AND CHIEN CHAM SIR! idea of ~eunice |
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title: 14.01.09 RED CROSS,WEEEE!
OKAY! today as per normal i had school, which was pretty boring. so won't write about it. YAY! i had red cross to day and the VI'S came. eunice and i was quite about it. sad thing was Kai ling went to indonesia and didn't come till 5+. hmmms so yeah guess what i did the most stupidest thing ever today i decide because i know how short i am i wanted to be taller than Edmand so i stand on the edge of a chair for like 5 secs. yeah stupid right decide to be SUPERMAN and did the pose like 1 sec ltr i feel on the floor i was laughing and i couldn't stand up i actually was hurt quite badly. I TOTALY REGRETTED IT! i couldn't do foot drill. i was like WTH! so i was stuck with the sec ones and a few mins ltr the sirs arrived i was like yay! ask them take over,ha ha. zk was like telling me they were going to do fancy drill today then i was like i wanna watch so at least i won't be lagging behind he was like no u go teach sec ones i almost cried lahs i really don't wanna lag behind then i found out weren't doing fancy drill. wahs so glad at least i won;t lag behind that much. so after red cross eunice, kai ling, me and the VIs went to CBM to grab a bite and have tcs. so yeah then went home and now I'm here. i can't stop drawing the superman logo, ahhhh(help).  |
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title: 15.01.09 heyss hahaha today i had great day well i think it was one of the best i've had for this month with my class. hahaha we were so totally bored after social studies(ss) so started to become restless, so lucky it was the end of our ss class so i went to de washroom and came back realize that my bag FREAKING INSIDE-OUT! thanks to fee and co. i was lyk wth how did you guys manage to flip it so yeahh i was unable to flip it back but in the end the guys helped. yeapp we actually thought it was super so we pranked lyk half class went they went to the wash room sharvin was the distractor, fee and kodes helped to flip the bags inside-out while eqa and i was on guard to check for people especially teachers hahahaha. so yeah when they came back they all saw it straight away but this lucky guy was the last ti be pranked. when the whole the class was back but him everyone wanted to prank him so we took his bag and flipped it inside-out but the best thing was he didn't realize it till it was lyk almost the end school the whole class was giggling non-stop but he didn't realize so when he did everyone was lyk, "OMG WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR BAG?" it was so fake he was lyk,"shut up!" his freaking bag looked lyk santa Claus's bag filled with presents but his was filled with books. then when it school was going to end we got a break about 10 mins earlier before the school ended so fee, eqa and i started playing with my silver sprinkles we were lyk "omg FAIRY DUST!" WE SPRINKLED IT ON SHARVIN! he was lyk screaming omg i gayyyy! then he shock his head to fee and fee goT em' on his hair then we started throwing it around our class and everyone was covered with sprinkles it was HILARIOUS!
TAG REPLIES: kailing: i don;t know her blog i will do it asap. hehe LCC: haha you better....:] BUVAN:hahaha you guys are so lame hmms... i miss you guys at my old seat hehe. but i lyk my new seat too. u should move dude. |
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title: 09.01.09 & 10.01.09 hey yall, i had my school's cca bazaar to day and i wasn't as great as i expected. i left even before i could start doing my duties. sad cause i had to go to work so yeah. tomorrow we have redcross flag day. yeahh okay so worked till bloody 5 in the morning so supposed to meet kailing and eunice tomorrow at 6.30 and slept for lyk 1 hr+ then went to meet them a go together. so met them then since were going to be lete we took a taxi ofcourse i paid cause it was my fault we were almost late so yeah ended up we weren't late. then DIDIDADADIDIDADADIDIDADADIDIDADAHHHH! went to novena to do the donation thing. wahs it was so tiring or was it because i only slept about 1 hr+ i could barely keep myself awake. so yeah i didnt get breakfast so went to nevena arly to get our breakfast then did our job till around 12.30 then went off the others went off again so me kai ling, eunice and one of our junior went to get our luch then went off. yehh so after that kai ling went to meet irene so left with me and eunice. so me and eunice felt like watching a movie but ended up doing liquid art. yeapp the one for kids.yeapp i actually had a good time doing it although i was surrounded by kids. and guess what we ate popcorn while doing it. so yeap thats a RAPP! let the pics do the talking for now
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title: 08.01.09 HEY! hihihihihihi! yeahhh i'm dying of boredom at home right now so lets look back at what has happened to day yeapp okay me and eqa went o dnt for our first lesseon meet my DARLING KAI LING! yeapp so happy we have a class together . walao eh you know yesterday she called me saying that someone stole her money i was like okay slow down and tell me everything it was like so obvious who took it but no evidence so can't say it was he/she who took it. so i was like wtf man you know that person is so irresponsible even if she want money go borrow lah den if no money can pay by installment right that bloody F! walaowei anyhow steal my friend money hope he/she realizes that GOD is always looking at whatever he/she was doing and she just committed a serious crime and sin. so soon KARMA will come to her because in this world what goes around comes around so yeapp blahhhh~ played friendster during DNT gave CHARMING ASH his comment... and did research for our project. yeap so after that me and eqa could not stop singing protons, neutrons and electrons it was like SUPER funny! we were laughing our way to class man.yeah so went to recess then nothing much happen drank green tea again and i just realize that i'm addicted to green tea thanks eqa, amy, ain and ash! yeah so in class me and buvan kept singing songs in class so yeahhh okay lah. guys made funny lame stupid jokes so couldn't stop myself from laughing all day! the guys always make my day!;D yeah so after that i felt so emotionless and so i couldn't remember anything STM! thats why i'm called SMURF! so went home talked to ash on the phone while going home. then went to my normal playground where i relax and study a while but today didn't study though there were a lot of kids so i was just looking at them it was fun because it made me remember when i was little how the slightest thing could make me so HAPPY! it was like nothing meant anything and i lived a free life. it actually make me really think back and appreciate the people who made a my childhood worthwhile i really appreciate it. when i saw how the teacher interacted with the kids and stuff it was really amazing how she had the patience. the sparkle the kids have in their eyes it was so PURE it was like something i never really realize it the difference when your a kid. it was amazing okay so here are some pics[BELOW]
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title: 07.01.09 ohhhhh! HI! okay today as per normal went to school ~ ohhh and guess what people I LOVE CHEMISTRY! i just love the way it is done all credit to MR MIKE GOH! he rocks OUT LOUDDD! hahaha me and buvan kept singing PROTONS, NEUTRONS AND ELECTRONS! hahaha yeapp i know lame right but it was damn funny. well had a preetty great day so BLAAAAAHHHH~ then after school went to hub with eqa and fee went to mini toons to get a bedazzler thingy... hehehe so excited to bedazzle my stapler wen i get home... so went to eat so don't wanna talk bout it though! so blahhhh~ then talked to CHARMING ASH! on the phone all the way home. then i started to bedazzle my stapler and then my mum came home she was like what a waste off money then after a while she was like i want, i want me and my sis started laughing was like u just now say waste money then u say u want. laugh and everything ended up like this[BELOW]
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title: 06.01.09 HEY! nothing special today just lyk everyday as time goes by your life gets shorter.so i was late again. then i was told that if i was late gain tmr i will have to go for detention. okay so nothing much happen today so blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, yeap then went to redcross meeting found oout i can't work on saturday so yeap have redcross flag day i'm be asking for your donations at VELOCITY@NOVENA SQUARE! SO BE THERE ORE BE SQUAREEE. hehehe lame joke. okay went to library to pay my super fine and then found out it was full so went o mac at juction 8 with ain to study till 5 then went home and allt the crap stared till now i think everyone has already got it clear that i hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate being at home cause even if i wanted to study someone just have to say the name "SYIMAAAA!!!!" THE BEUTY OF MY NAME HUH!!. OKAY SO THAT ALL HAPPEN TILL NOW!.
OH AND HOPE YOU LIKE YOUR NEW YEAR PRESENT ASH!!. AND ILY SERENE THANK FOR THE PANDA STUFF. YOU KNOW ME TOO WELL GALLL I LOVE YOU, PANDAS AND GREEEEEENNN!YEEEEPPPP sharvin was making fun of me during class cause i open my b'dai present in class and was like super happy. hahaha. but guess what the people around me were more excited then i was. weird huh. well that my class for you guys. SYIMMS;D PICTURE OF THE DAY!long time a go.  |
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title: 05.01.09 OKAY HEY SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL AND I WAS LATE!!! wth yeap.. mum was all lyk it was my fault and what soever with the crap, i totally floded her voice with music from my earphones as i listen to songs in the car on my way to school. hahaha early morning and i did one round around the field BLOODY NEW SHOES PEOPLE! yeah so did morning run. and went back to class. so blah, and bleh happened so nothing much except for the fact that i got stuck with a freaking guy who can't stop singing songs. that actually was on my top 10 listen list to my top 10 don't listen list. and his name is BUVAN! my fav line ever to say to hi and he knows it "BUVAN SHUT UP-!!!!!" but he is nice. he covers up for me when i'm tired. and start slackiing and fills me up with info and formulas on whatever is taught and what so ever. so then recess came and of course me , eqa, amy, ain, fee and zul were all seated in our what i call it HSM chair area.Lmao. SO THEN CHITTY CHATTY THEN ZUL WENT TO OPEN HIS GABB BOUT BIRTHDAY BASH!! and everyone stated chasing me around the school for a belated birthday bash, freaking THANKS A LOT ZUL. hahaha but zul got his too. hahaha so after recess nothing much happens but boring stuff oh and we actually change our seats for MTL class its lyk a so called u shape but really u shaped. hehehe thanks to the GENUIS SYIMA!!!!! okay then after sch went to hang at mac and studyied till lyk 4 went home to borrow hong sum e-math book and went for tuition. sos blah and bleh then after tutition talked to ash and bam otp till 8 i think then went home. they were so much fun OMFG! yeah, i really missed bams MEREPEK-NESS! hahaha. haha CUTE BAM AND CHARMING ASH! CRPPY MUCH!
SYIMMS;D |
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title: 04.01.09 okay hey yawww! its a sunday and i'm not going to the beach to sun bath, BUUUTT! i did overslept and went to religious school well it was lyk parent teacher conference + registering to the school + buying your books. so as per normal every year my sis and i will oversleep and go there late and of course since my dad is lyk running the school. so of course my sis and i will have to chip in and help. so yeah my dad was to lazy to see my teacher so went alone and i actually pass woo hoo! and apparently so did my sis wow she actually didn't stay back again. hahaha! yeap so stayed and help to sell books with they other kids whose parent are helping run the school such as arafat andnafeeshah. hey had fun then by 12 no one came and we started drawing on the boards and doing goofy stuff. and left everything to syidah muahaha. but whatever she didn't help in the starting anyways. so blh and bleh till 12.30 and started packing up and then waited for my mum to pick us up so we could go to toa payoh cause my dad had to go the dentist hahaha. so sent him there then went shopping for awhile in that area. after bout 0.5 hrs got some bubble tea and went back... yeap a boring daythen text ash till late then sleep.
SYIMMS;D |
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title: 02.01.2009 OH OKAY! first day of school man it was so damn boring. guess what we got the discipline teacher in charge for our for teacher. MISS CHIN! but we were quite okay with it. she's a damn fun teacher! okay wow sec 3 now. as what my friends and i would say dah naik pangkat seh. hahaha. okay so went to school and it was all blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. yeap super boring and the last thing they did to us was gave us a o level talk. it was all NO PRESSURE. BUT IT WAS SO PRESSURE! okay so after school gave talked to ASHISH on the phone and talked about how hard o level would be and everything then after a few minute we put down cause he wanted to pray and i was like okay.. wanted to ask him for song but to bad he had a photo shoot. then went to mc donald near my school and slacked with eqa and amy waited for ain but ain took so long so went to amy's house waited outside her house cause she needed to put her bag. so yeap then eqa and amy went to hub and i waited for ain cause she was feeling down and so being a friend i left the happy people and help a friend. den we went back to mc donald and used the toilet to dry off cause it was raining. then we were like aren't we going home anyway so then we were like so slenge.omg! den went to the bus-stop saw benjin, huang sheng, addison, yi xin, xu hua, khairi and lerkrit luksanakorn. i was like luksanacock then he was like siti nurhashitma... hahaha it was nice to see that joker again. so talked and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. then went home and saw mum she was nagging AGAIN! so i ignored and saw syidah sleeping and i went to sleep too....zzz then woke up and 5.30 realize no one was at home and watched tv. half an hour later syidah came home. i was so blurr! den somehow it was night time and i realize my phone had problems with connection. well wasn't only mine it was everyones so i think singtel had a problem yesterday, but who knows!then watched tv till 10+ and went to slack at my room and now it's time to sleeppppp. so nightynight!
SYIMMS;D |
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title: 01.01.2009 PEOPLE! 2009 is heree! let your down and start to partyyy... okay so 2009 is here and i have to get ready for my o levels. damn time past so fast! okay so yesterday went to facial and sort off had a girls day out with my mum and sisters accept for the fact that my mum was totally blabbering about everything throughout out the whole ride! damn I FELT LIKE SCREAMING SHUT UP ALREADY!hahaha but didn't if i did i wouldn't be blogging bout it already. okay to day is my dad's birthday but when i woke him up at 12 am he was like dun disturb i wanna sleep! have anyone realize that the marina bay concert this year SUCKED like crap! pleaaasse... they were totally lip singing and they couldn't even lip sing man even my lil cousin can do it. so year the new year started off with horrible lip singing but hey at least river may a rocked it as the last performance. thank GOD! OKAY SO NEW YEAR WAS BORING FOR ME! but hey schools starting that something to look forward to! but to bad i'm not so hype about it. dpn't know wwhy i guess the horrible lip singing just spoilt my mood i guess well thats all for today. sayoooooonaraaa!!! and to aziz damn it lah no more ILY! SYIMMS;D
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